Some of you may have seen this email before; supposedly, it’s got the wisdom of the Dalai Lama in it & what-not, and part of it is organising a list of animals “by your preference”. If you’ve ever been asked a question which is more random or left-field than that, let me know.

The idea is that these animals reflect your priorities in life. Somehow. Let’s go through this list. If you don’t want to be spoilt for when this email pops in your inbox, look away now.

Ok now the freaks are gone, we can get on with things.

  • Cow: represents Career. I dunno, cows never represented much to me. Some might consider cows “food”, or perhaps “milk”, or even “environment”, but Career? I’m noticing something with these animals - they’re all from the chinese zodiac (aren’t they? Tiger throws out “common domestic animals”). Maybe this email was written in 3000 BC when cows were pretty integral to careers in ye olde China. Wild guess here.
  • Tiger: represents Pride. Hmm, maybe. If you’re a hunter, having a tiger’s head over your hearth is one of those matters of pride, but quite clearly over the years has had an effect on the tigers themselves. And if you’re going to say pride, why not say Lion? King of the jungle et al? Feeds back into that idea of the Chinese zodiac, y’see? Either way, I don’t buy how a tiger is somehow linked to your perception of pride, especially in the era of emails
  • Sheep: represents Love. If there was one animal I had to say did not represent love in any way shape or form, sheep would pretty much have to be it. I don’t know about you, but an animal which is reknowned for its uncanny ability to look like all the other animals of its species doesn’t exactly put me the romancing frame of mind. Maybe something in the Chinese zodiac suggests sheep are particularly associated with love & all that, but it’d have to be a bit of a curveball. To say the least.
  • Horse: represents Family. See, sheep I might have bought here. Cow, even, what with the whole herds. But Horse? Family? That’s illegal practically everywhere you go, my friend. That Chinese Zodiac has got something to answer for.
  • Pig: represents Money. Greed, gluttony, piggy banks… ok, this one I can kinda buy. But since I can’t make a joke about the chinese zodiac here, I’m just going to say: what happend to the other 7 animals?

Next week: my next random email in my inbox! =)